Here’s my five tips for the men starting out who don’t want to go directly into cold approaches for the fear of being a creep. I’m not saying cold approaches themselves are creepy, but when first starting off someone can easily make them that way. This is more like a warm approach.

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I know, I know, some of you might say who cares how people perceive you and it’s all numbers. Well my friend, a lot of us do care. Nobody wants to get thrown out of bars or clowned on in front of a crowd. Sometimes dudes starting out don’t know how to cold approach at appropriate times, or know how to act / take rejection so they end up being a creep in that moment. Well here’s my tips I call it the warm approach, because these are some typical signs someone’s into you; it gives you a better chance she actually wants you to talk to her.

# Wait for eye contact.

Seriously, this is a big one. I don’t mean a one off glance either. If you see someone stare at you multiple times a night or one of your trust worthy buddies says she stares when you’re not looking, chances are she probably digs you.

# Smile and smile back.

If you do happen to lock eyes, give a smile or wait for a smile. If you guys both smile harder or laugh from across the room you’re golden. When you smile at someone and they look look disgusted, chances are you saved yourself from walking up to someone who really didn’t want to talk to you.

# “THAT’S SO FUNNY!” The non joke humor tip.

You know what I’m talking about. The vibe is right you guys are in the same group, or she’s next to your group and laughs at a really stupid joke. Yeah if you’ve been acting smooth all night, and she ends up laughing at things you didn’t even mean to be funny. Huge green flag she’s probably into you.

# Group assignments or engagements.

Whether it be at school, playing a game at the bar, or anything else that requires a group. If she always wants to be in your group, you’re doing good and she probably digs you. Even at a first met situation if she’s super eager to play pool with you or darts, you are 90% in solid my friend.

# Last but not least… The blatant friend.

Sometimes girls are just flat-out shy about things, and one of her bold friends will seriously straight up tell you she’s diggin you. Maybe you’re a damn male model or maybe you’ve been acting super suave and she’s feeling your vibe. Whatever it is, if her friend straight up tells you… go for it! I’ve seen too many dudes think a chicks friend is just lying or messing around.

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Attack Her Emotions

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A reminder from The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene:

“Remember: it is the form that matters, not the content. The less your targets focus on what you say, and the more on how it makes them feel, the more seductive your effect. Give your words a lofty, spiritual, literary flavor the better to insinuate desire in your unwitting victims.”

She will not so much remember what you said, but she will definitely remember the way you made her *feel*. Spark an emotional reaction using your frame. Slow down your words, emphasize points, show passion in understanding. Meditate.

Good luck out there boys.

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Messages not being sent

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So I’m sending messages and the app says they are sent but don’t show up in the sent box or the chat log. Happened to me yesterday around the same time. I’m not sending anything provocative, just having a conversation.

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What are some dirty talk phrases you say?

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I’m looking for common phrases like “choke me daddy” and stuff, if that’s considered common.

This is actually for my thesis, I shit you not, so anything goes.

In the name of education, I’d really appreciate if you would share your best lines. pls thank you.

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Have any if you ever gotten the “as friends” text and still ended up hooking up/dating the girl who sent it?

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Have any if you ever gotten the “as friends” text and still ended up hooking up/dating the girl who sent it?

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