How does an inexperienced 31 year old get started?

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Like the title says I’m 31 and have almost no relationship experience, have been single for 10 years, and can count on two ands how many times I’ve had sex in the past 10 years. I’ve been addicted to porn most of my life and am working on quitting and doing semen retention but it’s making me go insane. I’m currently on day 42 and the only thing on my mind is how do Iget better with women.

I have no idea where to start, or if I even should start before my brain is rewired and healed from my addiction (I’m worried that might take too long though and I’ve already gone this long without sex and dating that I’m not going to get any better if I don’t do something). So, as a clueless man in his early 30s with basically no confidence or idea how to flirt or approach or anything, where should I start?

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Talking To Girls (This “Formula” Makes It So You Don’t Run Out Of Things To Say)

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Talking To Girls (This “Formula” Makes It So You Don’t Run Out Of Things To Say)


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Girls Straight-Up roasting me

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First of all I’m not trying to brag, I feel like these facts are important for this community to understand the situation. I’m tall, muscular, and attractive.

Last night at a university party I was walking home afterwards with some girls I met. So these girls keep saying things to each other things like “Yea he’s hot but like he’s wearing a visor” (I was wearing a visor i think it looks good on me), and they said it just loud enough so I could hear them. And I playfully called out “I can hear you guys”.

These jabs and insults continued most of the way back and I knew it was some kind of test and I’ve experienced it before. Anyway, I never got upset, defensive, aggressive…etc. I just rolled with the punches and teased back a little too.

But we live in the same residence complex and I asked one of them (slightly isolated from the rest of the group) if they wanted to come to my room and got denied.

WHAT DID I DO WRONG?

and also how do I respond/react to girls insulting me as a test?

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Top 5 Cities In Europe To Get Laid With Beautiful Women + Infield

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Top 5 Cities In Europe To Get Laid With Beautiful Women + Infield


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View Reddit by Brad_socialView Source

Looking for a wingman in SF

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New to SF, and looking for wingmen.

Interests include lifting, eating, fashion, and basketball. PM me!

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View Reddit by berlinisdopeView Source

Not using Tinder anymore How can I actually pick up woman?

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So I (19m) never talked to women IRL because I’m really reserved, the strong quiet type. It’s tinder and Insta Dm’s is where I meet the girls I hook up with, and so far I’ve had slept with 13 different woman but it’s taken its toll on me (emotional wise). I feel comfortable on dates and I’m good at not being boring, it’s like a different me who’s more social and witty.

The problem is intially meeting girls IRL and getting her number, you know like normal things. I’m at a lost of how. I’m fairly attractive and dress nice but it’s really a facade for my shyness. I noticed that I’m more into non socially active girls who workout, are smarter than me, and have a sense of humor but again Idk where and how to meet and get their number. Any suggestions for a guy who’s who new to all this?

Edit: to include I don’t go to college and where I work, people are much older than me so that’s not a good place to look

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View Reddit by morethanIcanchew19View Source

Does anyone have any experience with identical twins?

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This weekend I was feeling down in the dumps, so I crashed a party and met a pair of attractive identical twins (who were hosting) who seem to be interested in me, given that they swooped in as soon as an opening emerged, after I had spent much of the night very obviously flirting with someone else (who was also very obviously into me). We talked about hanging out and doing some drugs together soon, and the girls hinted that this wouldn’t be the last time I’d see their house. Unfortunately, the situation wasn’t amenable to escalating further that night, but we exchanged contact info, and they seem genuinely interested in fucking me at least.

If anyone has any experience with twincest (whether it happened or missed), I would be very interested to know how it went down and what kinds of cues you got about whether they’re into doing stuff with each other or not.

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Why “abundance” and “self improvement” don’t always work, and you’re not going to like what you hear.

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I spent over 10 years “focusing on myself” and having an “abundance” mindset. I used to spend countless hours in the gym, ate obnoxiously healthy, learned to play guitar, learned to dance, learned pickup, cleaned up my wardrobe. Everything. I had a few successes here and there, but my greatest results happened after I acquired the most important element of life.

A sense of importance.

Do you know what the actual meaning of “I matter” means?

“I” means you. Consciousness. Energy.

“Matter” means tangible, existing, or of form.

In other words, depression implies non-existence. And sure enough, the universe reflects that back to us. There’s a sense of invisibility. So it doesn’t come as a surprise when saying “I don’t matter” that people start ignoring you. Sure, there will be a person or two who may help you, but this is just a generalization.

Self importance implies a sense of mattering. “I” (energy) “matter” (exists). You can call it self respect, will, presence, a sense of self importance, it doesn’t matter.

Every day I read through many of this sub’s posts and many posts from other dating-related subs. *There are too many men who don’t value themselves.*

“How do I get this girl to text me back?”

“This girl keeps ignoring me. What should I do?”

“She keeps cancelling plans on me but I have feelings for her. Help?”

Are you kidding me? Let me tell you something.

*You will not know self respect until you’ve gone through the pain of not respecting yourself.* When everyone has abandoned you, stepped all over you, raped your mind and your wallet, and set you on fire to keep themselves warm, ONLY THEN WILL YOU UNDERSTAND SELF RESPECT.

Go through the pain of being betrayed, or being taken advantage of, or being cheated on. It is encouraged. Why? Because the fear of pain is a powerful motivator. Your mind, body, and soul will not allow you to go through the same pain again. And when that realization occurs, self importance is born, and you begin to *matter*.

That girl who doesn’t text you back? Next. That girl who keeps ignoring you? Next. That girl who keeps cancelling? Next.

*This is where real abundance comes from*. It’s not a “fake place” where you pretend to have abundance. You have abundance because you’re willing to dump every girl who doesn’t give you the time of day and give your attention to girls who do. Similar to sales, you call 100 people, you’ll get 90 no’s, 10 possible prospects, and eventually 1 hard yes.

And guess what? It will be *easy, effortless, enjoyable, and mutual.* It will lack the bullshit hassle of dealing with difficult women. A wise man once told me “If it’s not easy, don’t worry about it”. In this post, easy has a different definition. A challenge can be hard, but it’s easy because it’s enjoyable. Asking 100 women out can be hard, but it’s easy because it’s fun.

If you’re feeling worthless, that’s good. It means you’re on the right path. It may take several months or years, multiple hardships, betrayals, and many bouts of abandonment, but one day you’ll have had enough, you’ll be reborn, and you’ll be grateful for the pain that people put you through. Without that pain, it may be difficult to evolve.

Even if you can’t feel it now, always remember how important you are. To me, to the world, and to the women who will admire your strength and wonder to themselves “How did he get there?”

Have a good weekend.

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